Thursday, June 07, 2007

a moment in the life of a germerican ;o)

I got this list from Allison's blog. I've seen it in various forms through email forwards over the years, but this one seems to be a little more up-to-date. Nearly every single one of these (please forgive the redundancy, but I'm trying to emphasize something here) applies to me. Read this, and you'll get a glimpse into my life. ;o)

You Know You've Lived In Germany Awhile If...

1. You refer to other Americans as "they" or "Amis".

2. You REALLY think AFN (Armed Forces Network Radio) is quality entertainment.

3. You realize that Ausfahrt isn't the biggest city in Germany.

4. You forgot how to use round doorknobs.

5. 100 MPH seems like you're really driving slow.

6. You start converting prices from euros to dollars in your head (Yeah, but that cup of coffee is FIVE U.S. DOLLARS!!)

7. Even at home you don't put ice in your drinks.

8. You never leave home without your keys, ID card, license, and passport.

9. You answer the phone "Hallo" instead of Hello.

10. You need a power drill and sledgehammer to hang a picture on the wall. (Or, if you're in the former East, you can't hang any pictures on the walls because the walls crumble at the slightest touch.)

11. You're used to the fact that there's a crane outside your house.

12. Sunshine actually becomes a topic of conversation.

13. You play "guess what town" the driver in front of you is from (HD, MA, KL, PS), based on their license plate.

14. You are incredibly careful about being loud during the "quiet hours" of 7 p.m. – 10 a.m. and 12 – 3 p.m.

15. You don't drive anywhere that you can take a bus/tram/train to.

16. You get excited about the great deal of paying under $4.50 a gallon for gas.

17. When visiting the States, you think that if you want to buy something that costs $0.99, it'll actually cost that exact amount.

18. For you, pay toilets mean there's another woman standing outside the "public restroom" with a change dish, glaring and demanding her 50 cents.

19. You know David Hasselhoff was a singer, and you think "I've been looking for freedom" is quality music.

20. You can wear black socks and nothing else that's black… and it's okay.

21. The only contact you have with other Americans is through Myspace.

22. Nature becomes its own entity for you (I went out into "the nature").

23. Martin Luther King Day, Memorial Day, Labor Day and Presidents Day fade in favor of Tag der Deutschen Einheit, Nikolaus, Erster Mai Tag and Heiligen Drei Königen.

24. You start writing the number 1,000.25 as 1.000,25 and your ones look like sevens and your sevens are a molestation of a 7 and a T.

25. Finger food ceases to exist. There's a utensil for EVERYTHING.

26. You know the lyrics to American Oldies in German – i.e. the Beatles' "Komm gib mir deine Hand".

27. You start to refer to hip hop, rap and R&B as "black music".

28. You've gone back to calling clubs discos.

29. When you think of fast food, Döner comes to your mind quicker than a burger.

30. The sauna doesn't scare you anymore.

31. You start introducing yourself with a German accent to your name.

32. You refer to your friends with the word "the" in front of their name. As in "the Valerie" and "the Leah".

33. You catch yourself putting verbs at the end of sentences in English.

34. You watch German T.V. and GET the jokes.

35. When people come to visit you, and you start telling them historical facts about the things you drive by.

36. Meeting people from Africa, Asia, and the Middle East is a normal daily occurrence.

37. You crave cake and coffee at 4:00 pm.

38. You start saying things like "I'll meet you at sixteen o'clock".

39. Bread, cheese and cold cuts constitute dinner.

40. You can name more German politicians than German actors/actresses.

41. When purchasing presents, you prioritize them as useful over being enjoyed.

42. You heat each room in your house separately.

43. When you talk about a two room apartment, the living room counts as one of those rooms.

44. Everything you eat needs to have nutritional value and you justify fatty things with "it's healthy".

45. Driving half an hour to go somewhere is a hassle.

46. $1,000 a year tuition seems like a lot of money.

47. You think soccer is the best sport ever invented.

48. Aldi satisfies all of your shopping needs.

49. All of your shoes are sensible.

50. You call your cell/mobile a "handy".

5 comments:

Patricia said...

That's very amusing--even if I don't 'get' half of them. :)

Anonymous said...

This is very funny...
I didn't get to read your blog for a long time but I am glad I finally got to do it again.
It's a lot of fun to look at it as a German who has spent a year in the US. I would say that I have experienced a lot of those things the other way around and that I have had fun experiencing the differences when coming back even more...
Thanks for sharing this!

The Raabs said...

I saw this over on Allison's also and the interesting thing is that it applies to things over here (NL) as well (though not the language specific ones).

Anonymous said...

I saw this on her blog too. Allison's good at stealing :) Only from blogs, though!!!

A lot of it applies to me as well except for the Armed Forces stuff.

thegermanygirl said...

Patricia: Yes, alas, some of these don't make sense to anyone who hasn't lived in Germany for a long time or spent time in/around the military. But I'm glad the list can still be entertaining anyway! ;o)

Ja-9: Hey, you oughta write a list for Germans looking at it the other way around! I bet some of us Amis would get a kick out of that, too!

Scott: Other than the language ones, I suspect that most of them would apply to most Americans living anywhere in Europe. Somehow, I find it comforting that we all have such similar experiences! Makes one feel less alone in one's weirdness. ;o)

Bri: Well, I stole this one from Allison, so she's not the culprit this time. ;o) Hey maybe we should come up with a list specific to Saxon-Americans?