The following thoughts were inspired by this, which I discovered by way of my new friend Carlos, whom I met through my former-acquaintance-turned-friend Aaron.
And that there, my dearies, is what we call 'networking.' But that's not what I'm writing about in this blopgost. What I'm writing about is communication overload.
How much is too much? How many is too many? Every day, most of us receive at least one electronic message--be it email, text message, or something relating to Facebook--that requires some sort of written follow-up. Some sort of written response. And some of us take an inordinate amount of time to make that necessary (I'm not saying 'required') response.
Why? Why is it so hard to hit 'reply' and type something? Why do we take so long to answer? One message per day isn't a lot, right?
What about 365 messages per year?
Some of you--and here I'm talking to my fellow old folks--will recall the days before email. No, really, such days did exist. They're dim and foggy in my memory, but I swear they really happened. In those days, the riotous heydays of my youth, I received about...oh, let's take a guess on the high side...20 hand- or type-written letters per year that required a hand- or type-written reply. Add to that various greeting cards for holidays and birthday, etc etc, and that number goes up to maybe 50. Maybe. Per year.
So, flash forward (and no, I'm not making a TV reference) to today. If I get one response-required message per day, I'm no longer at 50 per year, I'm at 365.
But I don't get one response-required message per day.
I get an average of 5.
That's 1825 messages per year. And each one requires a response. If I spend only half an hour answering each one, I will spend 38 twenty-four-hour days (24! Count dem! 24 hours! Ah-ah-ah-ah-ahhhhhhh!) out of every year doing nothing but answer messages. That's more than one month per year.
In the inbox of the email account Ed and I use jointly, there are currently 7576 emails. Of these, 667 are unread. I have no idea how many are unanswered. Most times, I feel like closing that account completely and starting from scratch. Except I know that eventually, the new account will look exactly the same, and I'll end up exactly where I am now with all this, which is:
frustrated
overwhelmed
angry with myself
and disappointed in myself, because I know some of those unanswered messages came from people who are disappointed in me for not answering.
I also have this continual, grand plan to answer all the comments I've received on this blog. Haven't been able to get that done, either--and every time I think about it, I feel a painful twinge in the center of my brain.
That twinge is one part irritation and three parts guilt.
At what point is it too much?
I'm so tired of communications-inspired guilt that I'm just tired.
I know 100% for sugar-torting certain I'm not alone in this. How do *you* handle the odious monster guilt blob masquerading as your inbox?
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
can we go back to handwriting letters and sending them through snailmail?
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4 comments:
Oh, wow! I love the new site design. I guess I'm glad I never finished helping you fix the other....
In answer to your question, I deal with the demand just as I deal with everything else in my life: genuine hyperbole.
No, really. You talked about the scarcity of communication in the good old days, and the necessity of response, and your thoughts danced against the edges of what I was thinking, but never quite got there.
When it comes right down to it, though, written communication is one of the most important things human beings ever do. I'm not saying that to self-aggrandize (although, of course, it does aggrandize me), but just as an analytical assessment of our history.
History! History is jotting down what happened. And that history has been filled with a rapid growth in technology driven, always, by the reliable communication of information between individuals. We've gotten better and better at it, and as we've done so, our lives have gotten better, too.
So when I get that email that I just don't have time to answer -- or when I've got ten minutes to spare and I'm trying to drum up the enthusiasm to deal with my backlog -- I remind myself that I'm participating human greatness.
That's quite a motivator.
I love the new layout and design, but as far as your "message" is concerned... I agree. Technology has created a very introverted society. We seldom have to actually deal with people or communicate. For me personally it is hard to bring myself to get out of my shell and just write a response, or to hit "send" on that email. It takes time and effort. But it is something we should all work on. Like Aaron said, it is one of the most important things in life.
hey court-
I have recently re organized my thinking on this matter (and it helps that it also applies to other areas of life too!) and here's my contribution to you: "handle" each email as little as possible. as in, don't read an email until you are mentally ready to respond to it in some way, whether that be jotting something down on your calendar, getting up that instant to find the necessary info, writing a check and sticking it in the outgoing mail, or immediately writing back with a general "how you're doing today" note. this has been such a lifesaver to me because then I'm not spending time rereading or backtracking, and it's also prevented most of the "fallen through the cracks" emails. also, I use gmail, so as soon as an email is "dealt with" it is "archived"...meaning I can search for it if I need it, but it doesn't clutter up my inbox. I can add labels so when I archive it's like filing for the more specific topics that reappear often. I even have a "this month" label with the thought that the msgs that I want to give more detailed responses to (but are not urgent) will be dealt with on the slower days when I have more time.
I'm sure you already do this, but I've also done it recently in my closet and pantry...the "simplifying" and saving mental energy idea. as in, "unsubscribe" or filter out all msgs that are not giving you enjoyment to read or "know there's a potential 70% to be saved" which ends up just taking your time every day to delete them. I've found great efficiency in just paring down everything so there's just not that much to have to sort through (at least mentally) every day.
which, it turns out, frees up more space for fun stuff like creativity and enjoying life! yippee!
good luck!
(how funny that the "word verification" is...elfest! like "you are the elfest one of us") :)
Aaron:
I guess I'm also glad you never finished, 'cause I kinda heart the new design, too. Thanks. :o)
You and your genuine hyperbole...but now that I've had a few weeks to ruminate further, I see your point--and I must admit I do get excited when I witness entire communities springing up around certain blogs, where a few months ago, there was naught but empty cyberspace... ;o)
Didn't we discuss recently how email is just an electronic version of an antiquated system? Maybe that's what bothers me: not that email needs to regress back to snail mail, but that it needs to evolve in order to keep up with those technological tools that have surpassed it.
JT:
"Aaron is right" does seem to be a catchphrase I'm hearing and repeating more and more often... ;oD
But I hear ya on the introverted aspect of all this. I just wonder if any of us would be any less introverted if our communications technology suddenly disappeared. Maybe the technology is just letting all of us be more genuinely who we really are.
Or maybe not. I don't claim to have any of the answers. But it's definitely interesting to think about. :o)
Allison:
Funny, I've actually been practicing some of those techniques you mentioned--filtering and unsubscribing and outright ignoring when necessary. And it has helped! with fresh messages; it's the old, monstrous backlog that gets to me when I let it.
Anyway...I use Gmail, too, and it really is a lifesaver with the filters and folders. And I like the idea of not handling an email until I'm mentally ready to do something with it. That alone is a liberating concept! :oD
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