Thursday, August 02, 2007
reality is setting in
On Wednesday, my parents boarded their flight from Frankfurt to the U.S. I think I still haven't quite started to process that they have moved to Oklahoma. To them, Germany is home. To *me* Germany is their home, too. That new house that they build is gonna have a pretty solid German cornerstone to live up to.
Another bit of unpleasant reality..... On Wednesday, Ed and I let our landlady know that we are moving out by October 31st. She was really upset to hear this, and I thought she was going to cry. Which made me almost cry. And we haven't even been close to her, though I'd describe our "professional" relationship as a good one. It was still a sad moment, and all three of us agreed that there was no "good" time to break this news. At least she understood our reasons for leaving.
But telling her that we're moving...it's just one more step toward making it all seem real.
And I don't like it. I don't want to think about it.
___________________________________
*Addendum: Ed and I have been watching a lot of "Quantum Leap" online lately. At another time, perhaps I'll blog about how much I love this show and how I wish they'd make a movie of it or something. Anyway, I've been trying to figure out why my non-TV-loving self has been wanting to veg out in front of the tube so much recently.
And I think I've figured it out: I'm watching because I'm avoiding. I'm watching because I don't want to think.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
I'm not sure reality ever set in for me until I was actually back on American soil. It's not an easy one to face and although you've been there much longer than I have, I know what you're going through. I wish I could be more comforting but really it's something that honestly takes time. Everyone copes in their own way (I was similar to you in that I watched a lot of TV when I normally don't), but just let yourself do those things because it's part of the process. I'm not saying that you should become shut off from society, but there can be a healthy balance.
It's hard to imagine a Chemnitz without you guys there. But I am excited that you'll be close by in a few months and we'll get to see each other more often. I miss you all a ton! I'm praying for you guys as you enter this transition. I know God will prepare and take care of you. LOVE YOU!
Thanks for your support and encouragement, Amychen. Elsa from Bremen has been telling me similar things, that I need to let myself do these activities that are unusual for me, because those are apparently the activities that are helping me cope. I'm not entirely comfortable with that emotionally, because I don't feel completely like myself...but intellectually, I know that I need to give myself time and have patience with myself.
I think if I can set myself the goal of finding that healthy balance you mentioned, it will go far toward helping me deal with all this.
It's hard for me imagine a Chemnitz without us....or an us without Chemnitz.... But I know there are also plently of positive things to look forward to! I'm glad we'll get to see each other more, too!
Thanks for the prayers....keep 'em coming. :o)
Post a Comment